"dolce et decorum est"
taylor. twenty two. connecticut. college grad. writing & literature major. aspiring publisher. certified life-ruiner. chris evans and i are the same person. the marvel cinematic universe has ruined my life. this is my artistic, literary, and multi-fandom clusterfuck of a personal blog. it oscillates back and forth between all of the above-mentioned genres on any given day. the majority of my posts are queued because i work a third shift

avenger(s) assembled
pro patria mori


1/? photos of chris evans x


“ Do you hear me, brother? ”
AU: berserkr!Thor inspired by (x)



thedirectorstark: “i’ll indulge them but also teach them tolerance and acceptance” well ok captain america i should have come to you first before rage-ranting because my initial response to intolerance and non-acceptance was… totally an intolerant and non-accepting post i guess. uGH help

no. im gonna stop you right there. because your point of that post was to shed light on tony in a way that is often overlooked. there are more than enough steve apologists to copy and paste pannels to counter argue against you which is (at least for me to even think of do) exhausting in itself. who say he’s from a different time and that morality for him is a very black and white thing and not fluid in any capacity. others to say he has too much of a heart to sacrifice anything he cares about except for himself and how it’s admirable and how people like tony need to take a lesson in that. but lets be honest, it is not always an acceptable solution to every problem. though steve rogers as one man can do many things, he cannot always carry the world on his shoulders like he is prone to doing and whisk it away from every problem that it comes to face with. its impossible.

also, i’ve always thought of steve and tony as complimentary. in an ideal sense if their heads and their hearts stopped getting in the way, they are the other half to the whole ideal? like steve fights for the future of people. tony fights for the future. as it exists, as it is, how its run. the physical capacity of the future existing as a concrete thing. in a sense you can’t have one part of it without the other in order to have a real ideal world in the future. and that’s the stuff dystopian novels are made of. striving for that balance. the sacrifices mad for people to make a better future or the people destroying themselves. and really when you’re looking at that core, there’s always going to be a struggle. any advancement tony has with good intentions, there is always the capacity that steve can and will oppose it because it compromises the freedoms of individuals or its a group of people putting their “i know whats best” foot forward without the majority consent of the whole. its a very deep philosophical thing and i don’t know if i’m alone in the fact, but i enjoy the debate of actions and discussions between them.

that being said, omg please don’t put me on a pedestal omg that’s kindof what it feels like you’re doing. i’m very steve rogers in my tendencies in all the wrong ways as well as the right ones. like i was literally nodding along with your large argument rant post because i’m guilty of a lot of your grievances against steve. there are times where the patience is just gone and i’m an explosive rage machine. i put far too much heart in everything and though i may forgive i do not forget and it is very difficult for me to reconcile and move on when it hits certain things. my values, my integrity, the things i enjoy. just anything and everything directly related to me. basically if i don’t feel like you respect me and if i feel like you constantly attack me we are just a done deal. i don’t tolerate it and in the rare cases i do it always seems to bite me in the ass and destroy me even more. like part of the reason i love steve as ive mentioned time and time again is that its a kindred spirit thing. its a personality thing. its a similarity thing. i really did not choose this. the steve rogers life chose me like damnit it roped me in with everything i love and now i’m just done.

but all of the bad aside with all the negative what i do try to do is try and get to a middle ground with others? like you and me. we respect that we have a favorite and we can agree that there are faults not only with the opposition. we don’t tear into one another about it constantly. we don’t devalue one another for what we are or what we hold close to us (aka: steve or tony). and we have common interests and stuff that add a balance so its not like its all marvel all the time. it doesn’t work with every person i’ve come across, but the attempt is there. that’s the kind of tolerance i mean. like the tolerance i mentioned the other night, basically. and because we both do the writing thing and you also do the lit thing which my god almost no one i know does so we look more at the whole picture than one minuscule thing like a character. we look at that character in relation to the world and the people surrounding them. its more inclusive and brings more of an equilibrium. we understand light cant exist without a dark pressing against it where many people focus on either light or dark. there is no coexistence and damnit people need to stop oversighting it and understand coexistence so much when it gets to fandom bullshit.

like its okay to like one thing over the other, but it is a part of a greater story. you need to bring the whole fucking story into the debate as it is and not twist the logic and ignore crucial details of characters to save a fragile fanboy behind from a steel-toe boot. like you can nitpick details all you like and build elaborate headcanons to explain what you like to make yourself sleep better at night and bash your friend’s favorite or ship choices and tear them into the ground because they’re interested in something outside of your interests because it makes you happy (which lbr it shouldn’t because no one should ever be mean to their friends about what they enjoy specifically), but if you ignore the context as it exists for the character in the specific fandom, everything becomes obsolete. everything in the end boils down to the story. it is a world and it is a physical solid entity and as they exist in it as they are. that’s why people like the thing in the first place. the story. /writer problems.

i’ll just!!! oh my god. i agree with almost everything but i do have something to add to that first paragraph though

Read More

alright last novel for the night woman my god i can only do this for so long and hopefully it is not a novel. 

[nope. its a novel. damnit.]

Read More